"You are in the World to Heal the World"

Some days we're stronger than other days.  Some days the sun shines just bright enough and long enough that you can kind of get a handle on things enough to have the vision to understand what's happening around you, what's coming at you and how you're feeling about that. 

By nature, I'm a happy person, pretty upbeat and enthusiastic about things, but living in a cool, northwestern rain forest, where the sun only shines in the summer, the lack of sunshine definitely affects me.  I find myself being bluer than usual. Believe it or not, Buffalo is a lot sunnier than Portland.  Snow reflects light, remember? Sometimes I react when I know better.

Weather, climate and all other physical events aside, stuff happens in our lives.  Someone says something that just hits you wrong and then you feel a bit badly. You try to bite your tongue, but man, those harsh responses get out anyway, and next thing you know there's an unfriendly exchange between you and someone. Before you can stop it, it's like watching a glass of wine fall to the floor. You see it going, but you can't stop it.  What a mess and worse of all, the loss of great wine!

That's where the gift of apology really is a grace and a blessing.  But, there's something more.  I have to remind myself when this happens that I have one single purpose in life and the Course in Miracles states it perfectly, "We are in the world to heal the world."  

Every time I stop and listen to my feelings when someone is saying something or doing something that triggers an inner reaction, I can slow down that glass of wine falling to the floor.  I can slow down a knee jerk response that may contain bitter biting comments.  While I have tamed that inner tiger cub a bit, there are times when I find myself wanting to recoil into a cave. Life isn't easy.  It never was meant to be easy.  

St. Thomas More said so wisely, "You can't get to heaven on a feather bed."  The way to heaven is right through all those difficult situations, right through those moments that take us unaware into the shadow, the darker side of ourselves, to the buried memories of childhood stuff, of angry, tired parents who may have hurt us when they were only trying to deal with or cope with stuff that felt too big for them.  

There is only one key to unlock all that pain and hurt and reaction and harsh biting responses to people, and that is by slowing down what you're hearing when it's happening, listening patiently to what they're saying and what you are hearing and attend carefully to how you're feeling about what's going on.  Try to target your feelings and then try to target where the other person is coming from.  The next step is to try to identify why you are feeling the way you are. What does it remind you of in your past?

The Course in Miracles says there are only two real reactions in life - one is to give love and the other is to ask for love.  All hurt that is inflicted onto another is a cry for love, but a cry for love stems from a person whose love tank is low so their cry for love is usually not very lovely.  The other is to be loving.  Loving behavior, loving words come from a person who is filled with love, coming from the only source of love which is the divine Source. But, even the most loving person has some dark stuff buried in their subconscious and life has a funny way of knowing just how to trigger that dark stuff.  Remember that it is being triggered for healing.  Isn't it possible that the angels allow things to come at us in order to spiritually target those areas that need to come to the light and be forgiven and transformed? 

We are all at different places with both.  We are all capable of so much love and we all are also carrying around wounds from our childhoods or lives that need love to be healed.  We all need to settle down and give ourselves and others a break. Forgive them, forgive you; love them, love you.  It is hard to say you're sorry to someone who has hurt you while you are still feeling hurt by them but you know that their actions were a cry for love that just zapped you where you are most vulnerable. 

Whenever you're wondering what this is about, remember that everytime someone hurts you or you feel hurt by someone or something, stop.  Just stop. Remember that it is a gift from heaven to heal something inside you that has gone unhealed for a very long time.  

It is important that we heal all that stuff from our past because it's going to crop up over and over again in our lives today and will either trigger other people's stuff or be triggered by other people.  As we slow it all down, think about things, feel what we're feeling but choose NOT to be controlled by those feelings, we can take a huge couragous step into the light of healing.  We can heal ourselves and consequently help others release their stuff in a safe environment of love and compassion.